Ruminating in Circles: A Guide to Breaking Free from Anxiety Loops
When Thoughts Won’t Stop
Have you ever caught yourself ruminating at 3 AM, your thoughts circling endlessly around that awkward thing you said at a meeting... three years ago? Don't worry - your brain isn't broken. It's just caught in what psychologists call rumination: a persistent loop of repetitive thoughts that refuse to quit. As a therapist who works with people who have ruminating thoughts daily, I can tell you that understanding why this happens is the first step to breaking free.
Let's get real about rumination and anxiety - that mental hamster wheel where we compulsively repeat and analyze past situations as if we're going to somehow change them. (Spoiler alert: we can't time travel... yet.) It's like reading the same page of a book over and over, hoping the ending will somehow be different.
But why does our brain insist on this endless replay? The answer lies in our neural circuitry, and it's actually pretty fascinating.
The Science Behind Rumination & Anxiety Loops
Your ruminating mind is like a well-meaning but overzealous security guard. The amygdala (let's call it Amy) spots potential threats and sounds the alarm. Then the prefrontal cortex (let's call it Prof) jumps in to analyze the situation. Usually, Prof can tell Amy, "Hey, chill out, that embarrassing moment at the coffee shop isn't actually life-threatening." But sometimes, these two get stuck in a feedback loop of rumination, like two people holding doors open for each other and neither wanting to go first.
Here's where it gets interesting: our brains evolved to learn from past experiences to avoid future dangers. That's super helpful when you're a cave-dwelling ancestor learning to avoid poisonous berries. It's less helpful when you're obsessively ruminating over that "reply all" email mishap from last month.
The tricky thing about rumination is that it feels productive. Our brain convinces us that if we just analyze something long enough, we'll figure out how to undo it. It's like trying to unscramble an egg - you can stare at it all day, but that egg isn't going back in its shell.
From a neuroscience perspective, this happens because anxiety and rumination activate our threat-response system. When this system is activated, our brain narrows its focus (hello, tunnel vision!) and gets stuck in what I call the "what-if spiral." The anterior cingulate cortex - basically your brain's worry DJ - gets stuck playing the same ruminating thoughts on repeat.
“Your ruminating mind is like a well-meaning but overzealous security guard”
Breaking Free From The Anxiety Loop
But here's the good news: understanding this process gives us power over it. When we recognize that rumination is just our brain's misguided attempt to protect us, we can start to work with it rather than against it.
Think of it this way: if your smoke alarm went off every time you made toast, you wouldn't spend hours ruminating about why the toast triggered it. You'd recognize it as an oversensitive system and maybe adjust its settings. The same goes for your rumination alarm system.
Through my work with anxiety and Brainspotting, I've seen how this understanding can transform people's relationship with their ruminating thoughts. Instead of getting frustrated with yourself for ruminating, you can acknowledge it as your brain doing its best to keep you safe - even if it's being a bit extra about it.
Here's a truth bomb: shame and guilt often fuel these rumination cycles. They're like premium gasoline for your worry engine. We ruminate over past events not just because we're trying to change them, but because we're still carrying the emotional weight of them. And let's be honest - that's about as useful as carrying around an umbrella in the desert.
The solution? Identify what is truly going on underneath the rumination and why your brain is triggering a “fear and resolve” response. What is the anxiety that the ruminating thoughts are about? Is it a fear of rejection? Embarrassment? Fear of looking dumb? What is the felt-sense in your body when you are ruminating about that “situation?” Do you feel it in your chest? Gut? Head?
The path forward isn't about eliminating rumination and anxiety (sorry, not possible), but about understanding it. Once you identify the themes that contribute to it (like rejection) and recognize where feel it in your body, Brainspotting can help process the anxiety back to a “normal” less distressing “3am-wakeup-anxiety".” When we recognize these patterns for what they are - well-intentioned but overdramatic protection mechanisms - we can start to loosen their grip.
So next time you find yourself stuck in a cycle of rumination, remember: you're not crazy, you're not broken, and you're definitely not alone. Your brain is just doing its best impression of an overprotective parent.
If you want to know more about reducing ruminating anxiety, check out Anxiety Therapy or contact me with any questions!
